Today we’ll look into some of the signs he doesn’t love you anymore. If you’re starting to notice that your relationship isn’t what it used to be, despite all your efforts, and you feel like he doesn’t care anymore, it’s perhaps time to re-evaluate.
Lately, he hasn’t been talking to you as usual. It’s more like he is becoming withdrawn; he doesn’t text or reply to your messages and whenever he does, he just replies with a one-word syllable, “okay”.
Are you faced with this situation or something similar? You might feel your man is pushing you away and doesn’t want to be with you anymore even if he hasn’t said it outright. Perhaps you’ve noticed some changes in him that you just can’t explain.
Do you want to know the signs that he is indeed no longer in love with you? It might be painful (okay, it will definitely be painful) but it sure is better to know so that you can define where your relationship stands.
Ready? Here we go.
1. Lack of communication
This is arguably one of the most painful signs he doesn’t love you anymore. Communication is key in every relationship and whenever there is a lack of it or it isn’t effective, the relationship has a higher tendency of falling apart.
Effective in the sense that he is not ignoring you but the interest to talk that he used to have just isn’t there anymore. Note that this includes both verbal and non-verbal communication. When you notice this over a prolonged period of time, even after putting in efforts to fix it, then you should realize that it’s likely his feelings have changed.
2. Giving unnecessary excuses to avoid you
So normally, you guys loved being together at all times but nowadays, he gets irritated at your every breath, not to talk of hanging out together; girl, this is definitely a bad sign.
Also, if it has come to your notice that somehow you cannot run into each other despite being in the same house, you should know that it isn’t a coincidence. He may just be giving you an indirect signal that he wants out.
Sometimes, in order to avoid going out with you, he might give unnecessary excuses or make something up which you obviously can see through in most cases. This is one of the more subtle signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
3. Being secretive
For instance; excusing himself to pick up a call, not allowing you to have access to his phone, as usual, tilting his phone so that you won’t be able to see his messages when you sit beside him or going out without letting you know of his whereabouts and whenever you ask him about it, he “puts you in your place”.
A guy who loves you would tell you most things and would not want to hide anything from you but if that is not the case and he doesn’t love you anymore, he would feel like he has no duty or obligation to let you know and you have no right to question him.
To him, his feelings for you and the time you guys spent together are in the past now. This is definitely a bad sign and you should as well take it seriously.
4. Getting angry with no definite reason
Perhaps your man has always been a patient fellow, always easy going with people and even more with you but then, you suddenly notice that he has been getting angry and yelling at you for every little thing you do, and might sometimes, feign being angry so as to push you away.
His tolerance level drops by the minute and he is always doing things himself because according to him, you make him angry. He is likely trying to opt out of that relationship and he is giving you every reason to do the same.
5. He gives you little or no attention
Another one of the signs he doesn’t love you anymore is that he does not want to be involved in your life. Whenever you want to talk to him, he says he’s busy and when he does, he doesn’t even give you attention; he avoids your eyes, and probably picks up his phone while you “rant and ramble”.
Perhaps he no longer asks you how your day went, how you feel, or even takes you out on a date. He prioritizes little things over you and says no to any suggestion you make that might try to revive his feelings for you.
Another case is him being weirdly quiet when you know you did something that would have made him angry. This could be tricky though. He might be holding in his anger and waiting for the perfect time to explore or he might just be totally uninterested in whatever you do.
6. He keeps forgetting special events
Special events such as your birthday, valentine’s day, anniversary, and other special days are rarely forgotten by those that cherish you, not to talk of the person you are dating. Also, if on his birthday, he decides to spend it with his friends and does not give you any time throughout the day, this is a sure red flag.
7. He stops saying loving words
Although we cannot say all men do this because they might push for the fact that they believe in actions rather than words, quite a number of them do. Words of affirmation of love soften a partner’s heart, so people tend to use it a lot.
The absence of loving words such as “I love you”, and “I miss you” for a very long period of time, with no action to be meted out in its stead, is a big but sometimes subtle sign he doesn’t love you anymore.
8. He does not care about your feelings
Regardless of what a man is going through, he would still care about his lady’s feelings. He might not be as sweet and loving as usual, but he would still try to know what’s going on with you. He would comfort you and try to make you feel better.
So, here’s the sad twist: This is not the case for a man who is falling out of love with his lady. He might have little or no interest in whatever she’s feeling. Although he might be aware of what’s going through her mind, he pretends to be unaware – simply oblivious.
9. He doesn’t want to have anything to do with you in public
When your man does not want you to be seen with him in public, or doesn’t introduce you as his woman to his friends but just wants to keep it between you two in private, it could be a sign that he doesn’t love you enough and is trying to opt-out of the relationship.
Whatever a man cherishes, he boasts about it. He should do the same for you. He should be able to stand with you – as your man – in public and introduce you as his woman whenever the need arises; and not you, hiding away like a side chick.
10. He blocks you out from contributing to decision making
Before now, anything that was agreed upon was a mutual decision. But recently, you often try to guess what’s going on in his mind. He does not tell you about any project, work or anything regarding him, he just wants to do it all by himself and for himself. Those feelings of togetherness and connection he once felt with you are all in the past now. This is definitely not a good sign.
11. Being rude with his words
He starts to use harsh words on you without caring if he is hurting your feelings. He doesn’t filter his words, he just says them the way he wants and sometimes, he does this intentionally. Also, he might reply to you in a sarcastic manner. For him, all he knows is that he wants to leave the relationship but might not know how to put it in words, so he just uses this impolite behavior to blurt out his feelings.
12. He begins to compare you with other women
With any little flaw you make, he uses that as an opportunity to bring up other women, especially his ex. No man who loves his girlfriend or wife would compare them with any other; instead, he would learn to accept her flaws while helping to make her a better person.
13. He looks for every opportunity to disagree with you
When he starts picking on you at the slightest chance – for example, “you didn’t place the flower vase properly” – and then blows it out of proportion, you should know that something is definitely up. He might be going through a phase but when this becomes a predictable and consistent action, there goes up a red flag warning you that something is not right with his feelings for you.
14. He stops apologizing for his wrongdoings
Even though he is aware of what he did wrong, he ignores it totally and does not apologize. While on the other hand, he wants you to apologize quickly, and if you don’t, he might use that as a reason to break off the relationship.
Just any reason becomes good enough to pick up a fight with you – one which would eventually lead to a 3-day misunderstanding. Oh! Did you break his glass mug? That makes it a 7-day fight. All in all, this is another red flag that shows that he does not respect your feelings or your opinion on things.
15. He asks for a break
Each person needs his\her own space from time to time to think and reflect, or just “me time” and this helps a lot in many relationships. However, when either side starts to crave their alone time more than usual, then something is wrong and needs to be addressed.
If your man starts behaving this way, it is either he is stressed or carrying a burden that is obviously too heavy for him to bear alone. And for the unpalatable part, he probably wants to opt-out of the relationship asap.
It is important to remember that signs like these can be caused by many different factors in a relationship. However, what is certain is that they are definitely important signs that shouldn’t be overlooked.
Remember, effective communication is the key to any long-lasting relationship and the lack of this would bring about a lot of misunderstandings, unnecessary excuses, and secret-keeping.
When your man starts getting angry for no reason or grabs every opportunity he gets to disagree with you, forgets special occasions, stops saying sweet words but uses harsh and rude languages, offends you and does not bother to apologize, blocks you out from making or contributing in decision making, hides you away in public and starts comparing you with other women and ultimately asks for a break; this is not a coincidence! I repeat this is not a coincidence.
You should be able to check if it is just a phase or he really has fallen out of love with you – whether it’s a passing moment or the beginning of the end of the relationship. It’s your call to make.
However, as much as these signs are red flags in many relationships, you should not be too quick to draw up a conclusion. Like I said earlier, some of these behaviors can be as a result of stress – probably long days at work or a tiring project at hand – causing your man to act up.
These signs could be tricky, and if not properly evaluated with patience and wisdom, could lead to the termination of a sweet relationship that just needed a little space. The red flag keyword here is CONSISTENCY. If your man continues to display these behaviors on a regular basis, then you should take it seriously.
In this case, “seriously” means gradually releasing your mind from the tight grip the relationship had on it. This way, if he eventually requests a breakup, it would be easier on your part, to break off any existing ties.
Now that you know the signs to watch out for, put on your detective goggles, knot your Sherlock Holmes tie, and get into the field for some real action!